A Day in the Life of a Feminist Porn Filmmaker

The inspiration for creating ForPlay Films emerged from a deeply personal experience: After an abortion, I struggled with a significant loss of sex drive. In my quest to reignite my libido, I turned to porn, only to feel disappointed by what I found. Much of it felt too aggressive and performative, lacking genuine chemistry and connection. The films often focused solely on close-ups of genitals, providing little insight into the actual pleasure experienced by the performers.

With a background as a costume designer in the film industry, I had the skills and connections to realize my vision—a more sensual and moody aesthetic. Facing challenges with limited connections to talent and a tight budget, I began filming couples from the sex-positive Burning Man community, and word quickly spread. The couples I shot loved the films, and thus ForPlay Films began to take shape.

As my network grew, I connected with adult industry performers who were eager to create something meaningful, something their heart was in. 

A typical day in my life as a feminist filmmaker often begins with a cup of tea and a barrage of emails. There’s a lot of behind-the-scenes work: coordinating schedules, organizing shoots, and communicating with talent and crew. Administrative tasks can feel monotonous, but they are essential to ensuring everything runs smoothly. I juggle meetings, discuss concepts with my team, and plan future projects. It may not always be glamorous, but it lays the groundwork for the creative work that follows.

On days when we’re filming, the energy shifts. These days are a mix of excitement and intensity. I step onto set, and despite the long hours, there’s a palpable thrill in the air. The atmosphere is filled with creativity and collaboration.

For most of my monthly releases I collaborate with talent to create a storyline based on their likes, interests, and personal style. I meet with them ahead of time and gather information in an interview — brainstorming session and then create a story around the talents input. I let talent choose with who they want to perform in order to create the most authentic pleasure and chemistry.

For the sex itself I don’t tell talent how to have sex or what sex acts to perform. Instead, I talk to them about “at home sex” vs “performative porn sex”. Sometimes we brainstorm positions together, especially if there are some challenges in how to use the location if sex isn’t happening on a bed. But for the most part, I tell them to do what they enjoy doing for as long as they enjoy doing it.

Before every sex scene we have a consent talk where talent tells each other and me their likes, dislikes, their YESes and NOs. That is the only framework in which sex is happening.

I mostly work with professional talent so they usually don’t get nervous but I have also worked with real life couples that have never been in front of the camera. I put a lot of effort into creating a safe and comfortable space and I give everyone the space and time they need to feel comfortable. I think the most important part is to listen and go with whatever talent feels comfortable with.

Most talent feels very comfortable in the nude, so they don’t put on clothes between takes. But we have robes in case anyone feels like covering up during a break. But talent has also told me that on sets where people are eager to provide them with robes during breaks it makes them feel uncomfortable because then it feels like they shouldn’t be naked, which in turn makes them uncomfortable to be naked and thus interferes with their performance.

 I remember my first day on set vividly; I felt a wave of anxiety, fearing a panic attack or breakdown due to my past. Because I grew up in a cult, I was exposed to sexuality at an early age. And it caused my body to tense up and go into fear mode anytime I witnessed other people’s sexual experiences. However, the supportive environment created by the talent and crew transformed my experience. Their care and consideration fostered a sense of love and trust, allowing me to embrace my role.

As a filmmaker, I find empowerment in being behind the camera. I can set boundaries and make decisions that reflect my vision. Creating a safe environment is crucial—not just for me but also for the performers. I work closely with talent, allowing them to express their desires and dictate how they want to portray their sexuality. Real pleasure is rooted in autonomy and agency, even in contexts where power may be willingly relinquished for mutual enjoyment. At the heart of ForPlay Films are themes of chemistry, connection, intimacy, and autonomy. Consent is integral to this; true consent can only exist when individuals have the freedom to choose.

The empowering atmosphere extends to our viewers. Our films reflect their desires—not only sexually but also in how they wish to be treated. This reflection of the viewer’s desires and sense of self acts like mirroring, empowering the viewer and challenging the harmful narratives often perpetuated in mainstream porn.

While pornography is becoming the scapegoat for many things undeservingly for the most part, mainstream porn, like all media, can affect our world views. That said, even mainstream porn isn’t all bad. Some studies have shown that people who consume porn often hold more egalitarian views “toward women in positions of power, toward women working outside the home, and toward abortion--than nonusers of pornography. Further, pornography users and pornography nonusers did not differ significantly in their attitudes toward the traditional family and in their self-identification as feminist.” 

Nevertheless mainstream porn can also have negative effects on body image, reinforce traditional gender norms, and create unrealistic expectations about sex, sexuality, and relationships.

Mainstream porn often portrays unrealistic scenarios that create unrealistic expectations about what kind of situation is conducive for sex to happen and the sex acts in mainstream porn are often not actually pleasurable for the female performer. And because in the absence of adequate sex education, porn de facto serves as a source—especially for young people—to learn about sex. Since women are often portrayed as docile and submissive, it reinforces the harmful stereotype that women exist solely to serve men’s pleasure and have no sexual wishes of their own.

Additionally the lack of representation of body types can contribute to negative self-image among female viewers. There is also a lot of work left for more representation of diverse ethnicities in porn. 

Over time, I am also realizing that while the cult I grew up in was extreme, it is by no means unique—it mirrors many problematic elements in our society. The MeToo  movement has only shown us the tip of the iceberg. All of those men in power taken down by MeToo modeled the exact behavior that the cult leader Otto Muehl did. It is no secret that sexism and sexual violence runs deep in our society. And with my work I am not only trying to right the wrong that happened to me but also the problematic sexual and repressive narrative in society at large. Making ethical, feminist porn through ForPlay Films is my form of social activism, because I am far from the only one—especially among women—whose sexual boundaries have been crossed.

Want more from Inka Winter? Check out ForPlay Films.